A Big Slice : Life's a Blog

Kate Bush - Director's Cut and Me by Ted Field

I know there are many of you out there who can remember exactly where you were when you first heard a certain song was. The song, the moment, the place, the smells were somehow right, perfect, so that hearing the song takes you right back to that time. Like you, there are songs that capture moments and albums that describe periods in my life. The term soundtrack of your life is so overused, maybe because it is so right. Kate bush has been the soundtrack for my life.

I first heard Kate on Saturday Night Live in 1978 I think. She sat on the piano while Paul Schaffer played the "Man with the Child in his Eyes." That evening she also sang "Them Heavy People" dressed in a trench coat with a voice so high I am assuming only dogs could appreciate the nuances. My memory may fail but as I recall the audience sat there confused, not really liking it, but sort of polite. Clearly this is not American music. It's all corpuscles and no muscle. Frankly, I liked her because she was weird and I so desperately wanted to be weird. In reality I was entirely regular, as regular as toast. I was on a mission to be the first of my friends to like her. But there was a problem. The next day, Sunday, I couldn't remember her name. I asked my cousins if they remembered this strange high pitched singer on Saturday Night live. Thankfully they did. Seriously, I owe them a big debt of gratitude. Monday morning I went to Turtle's (OK Atlanta people, remember Turtles?) and bought her album "The Kick Inside."

So that is my intro into Kate.

Blah blah blah… years pass

I came out the year Never for Ever was released. (Soundtrack of Ted's Life, Side One, Tracks 4 and 5)

I was in Athens at the University of Georgia, when Hounds of Love absolutely changed my life. (Soundtrack of Ted's Life, All of Side Two - I mean come on, the Ninth Wave is spectacular!)

Coincidentally, my first real boyfriend, Tom, had a part in that life changing year. I bought Hounds of Love, but not the tacky black vinyl. Oh no. I had the deluxe, grey vinyl (although they said it was pink. Maybe in England dun and pink mean the same thing). I don't think that I have ever played one album so much in my life. Tom and I even planned an evening when everyone was gone. You see we lived in a house with two other gay guys and privacy was at a premium. We put the album on and listened to it complete.. All the way through. Even now I can see the beige couch in that wonderful house on Prince Avenue in Athens. It was as if the we were being swallowed by the music. We half joked and half prayed that Kate would just MENTION our name in a song. Something akin to religion I guess. No that's not right, something akin to real emotion. Tom and that album will forever be linked.

Tom was HIV positive. He had a roving eye. Tom liked sex. Only sex, I guess didn't like Tom so much. Anyway, we broke up before The Sensual World was released. But the love was still there. He was my best friend. One night, not long before he died, he came over to my small little efficiency apartment in Atlanta and we listened to The Sensual World from beginning to end. Sort of Hounds of Love Part Two. He was so sick, and thin. But we got to share Kate. It wasn't long before Tom's condition worsened. A friend of Tom's named Harry Knox performed one of the most gracious acts any human has ever performed. He opened his home to Tom and me during Tom's last days. Hospice had provided a bed for Tom. I would lie next to him and sing in his ear "I know you have a little life in you yet, I know you have a lot of strength left… I should be crying but I just can't let it show… all the things we should have done but we never did.." "This Woman's Work" from the Sensual World was so full of regret, exactly what I was feeling.

Tom didn't live to see The Red Shoes released. I bought the album and set it aside for four days so I could have an evening with Kate uninterrupted, listening to this new album in that same space where we had shared The Sensual World. (well cd, yes, I went into the 20th century kicking and screaming, but I went) If anyone is reading this and you know me, you know that Kate can do no wrong… sort of. I wasn't convinced by The Red Shoes. I didn't love it. But as I was listening this song called "Moments of Pleasure" came on. To me it was all about trying to clear away any sadness and regret and look for the beauty and happiness. I loved it. The sweeping violins around the chorus… "Just being alive, it can really hurt." At that moment, yes it did. I wished Tom was there. Toward then end of the song, Kate mentions what I can only assume are people in her life of whom she has strong memories. I froze when she came to the line "Hey there Teddy, spinning in the chair at Abbey Road," The hackles stood up on the back of my neck. Tom did it… Somehow, he got Kate Bush to mention my name in "The Red Shoes." I still can't think about it without crying.

OK, enough with the maudlin. Overall, those years were dark for me. I sometimes tell my friends that they were the grey years, the bleakest period of my life. The President hated us, we were inexplicably dying, and I was scared.

This brings me to Director's Cut. Kate has gone back and reworked those two albums. Praise the dispassionate universe! There is so much of my baggage in those songs, and now their essence is changed. I listen to them and of course I think of yesterday. And yes, there is pain, but somehow it is different. I am not taken back, I am viewing it from here. The blow and the memories have been softened. And through Kate, maybe Tom has given me one more present.

May 30 - Canasta, Six Feet Under and True Blood

I remember my parents and their friends playing Canasta. They were probably younger than I am now, but they seemed like a bunch of old fogeys playing some silly old person game. 

Well, welcome to Old Fogeyville, population me!

Clare, Marianne and I discovered Canasta about seven years ago. I had printed the rules off of the computer and one morning I was reading them aloud. Their eyes began to glaze over. "You are dealt 13 cards," I read. "But twos are special." I kept reading, "and threes are special, and sevens are special, oh, and aces are special." I could see it in their eyes, after "and threes are special" everything else I said was white noise.

I cajoled and pleaded and finally we sat down and started playing a few hands. We were addicted. But I must warn you, Canasta is complicated, and worth it. Even today we have to keep the rules close at hand. I still can't remember if you can play black threes in a meld or not. (Did I mention you get to learn some cool lingo? OK, not so cool, but lingo is lingo.)

This love affair lasted for fives years. We would get together in a cabin near Ellijay, Georgia and spend Fourth of July Weekend playing Canasta and watching the dvd's of Six Feet Under. Clare even has "canasta jammies" so she can roll out of bed in the morning ready to play, and then roll back into bed at night when the last episode of Six Feet is over.

Needless to say, we finished Six Feet Under. Marianne moved to Virginia, and yearly weekends ended. These will always be some of my favorite memories, the wine, the food, the cards and the tears (Six Feet Under is sad, you know.)

But... this story has a happy ending. Marianne has moved back to North Carolina. Alan Ball has a new show (True Blood which we have just started. Holey Moley, these ain't your mother's vampires.) I have have two decks of cards with their names on them. Here's to the new memories!

The moral of this story is: Love your friends. Spend time with them. When the end comes, have no regrets! 

More later, I have to play my initial meld!

For the rules on how to play Canasta, click here.

May 25 - A Weekend in the North Carolina Mountains and a Wine Challenge

There are some vacations that are mere weekends, but you look forward to as you would a month long getaway. This is how we feel about getting together with our dear friend Marianne. The three of us just click. I don't know why, our personalities are very different, but we each contribute something different to the mix and it works.

Marianne just completed a new home in the mountains of North Carolina. The view, as you can see, is spectacular. The air is clean and refreshing, not a peep except for nature. During the day we would discuss what's going on with our lives as we sipped wine and gazed out at the tree covered mountains. You felt trivial and majestic at the same time.

But when we started dinner each evening, we would break out the dance music and it became very "The Big Chill." Singing, laughing and moving in a way that only middle aged white people can. Barely rhythmically, but certainly joyfully!

But let me get to the point of this blog entry. Clare suggested that we have a wine pairing challenge. She would send us the recipe of the dish she was planning to cook, and we would all bring what we thought would be the best wine. The dish was Shrimp Crepes in a White Wine Cream Sauce (recipe link below).

I brought an Ugni Blanc/Colombard blend from Tariquet in Gascony, France. I thought the acidity would cut thought the cream sauce. Clare brought a Spanish Verdejo from Naia, for much the same reason. Grassy, but clean taste and acidity for the sauce. Marianne went a completely different route, she chose a rich and semi-sweet Chardonnay from Simi in California.

First we tried them as sippers. The Ugni Blanc won. It was unique, light and refreshing. As we relaxed on the porch this wine really matched the setting, warm day, slight breeze and a mild refreshing wine. Clare's Verdejo was second and Marianne's wine was the unanimous loser. Too sweet, too oaky and round, almost heavy. It was the sweetness that really threw us. Nowhere on the label is there any inkling of the residual sugar. If the axiom "Americans talk dry and drink sweet" is true, then the popularity of this wine proves it. If you love dry wines, this wine is not for you.

Then we moved to the meal. I was cocky and convinced my Ugni would shine again.

But, the Ugni Blanc was not just overwhelmed by the dish, it was obliterated. No taste at all. I had forgotten the first rule of wine and food pairing: "The weight of the wine should match the weight of the dish." My wine was way too light at only 10% alcohol. I should practice what I preach.

Second, again, was Clare's Verdejo. It had more oomph than the Ugni, but the grassiness was slightly unpleasant with the rich and smooth shrimp dish.

So... Believe it or not, the Simi Chardonnay was unanimous winner this time. The weight and richness of the wine, perfectly matched the weight and richness of the dish. The sweetness and the oakiness were gone, replaced by a mellow fruitiness. You never know do you?

That's the beauty of wine. Because it is so varied on so many levels, we may never fully understand it. But we have a lot of fun trying! Below are our VIniCodes™ and Perfect Pairings for each of the wines featured.

Perfect Pairing : Simi Chardonnay (Vinicode™ here) and Shrimp Crepes in a White Wine Sauce (recipe here).

Perfect Pairing : Tariquet Ugni Blanc/Colombard (Vinicode™ here) and Bourride (recipe here).

Perfect Pairing : Naia Verdejo (Vinicode™ here) and Tilapia in a Cilantro Beurre Blanc (recipe here).